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It’s working! Going to the gym is working! Last night I wore a tank top to the gym and as I was going through my arms workout I was seeing MUSCLES in the mirror. Muscles! And the jiggly arm is on its way out! Well, hopefully. Although I am sure a little jiggle is going to remain. A little jiggle is alright. Earth quakes as I wave to someone are not. Jiggly Arm Syndrome (Or, JNS.) Stop The Pandemic.
We have been eating pretty good also, if I do say so myself. I have been (for the most part) making nutritional, homemade dinners every night. Besides that one time last week we had pizza. Oh……fuck. And we had McDonald’s on Sunday night. BUT I did find this new machine at the gym…and I can burn 350 calories in FIFTEEN MINUTES. Take that, bubble butt and supersize fries.
And good lord, the ladies at the gym. Some of them look like they haven’t eaten a double cheeseburger – ever. Some of them look like they would kick my ass in about 3 seconds. Some of them wear clothes to the gym that are SCARIER than this ensemble, if you can imagine.

Some of them can run for an hour on the treadmill and not sweat an ounce, stepping off the machine with a full face of make up and their iPod’s blaring “MY HUMPS! MY HUMPS MY HUMPS MY HUMPS!”
Meanwhile I’m usually looking like I just came out of a dunk tank after ten minutes on the elliptical and panting like I’ve just run the NYC marathon. And groaning like I just finished three Big Mac’s.

Bitches.

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